Posted by: jude49 | February 12, 2014

It Ain’t Necessarily So!

Happy February, Everyone!

Do you know that there are at least 3 ways to interpret any given situation, issue or action?  This is one of the “truths” I learned during my Satir training, and it’s been one of the most useful life tools I know!

heart-70982842.jpegUntil my Satir training, I would sometimes find myself fervently and tenaciously clinging to one belief that I just “knew” to be true.  The more I clung, the more stuck I became.  Depression, anxiety and anger deepened.  My body tightened and my mood darkened.  I was digging myself into a deep rut.

An example:  I remember a time when I mislaid my keys just when I was about to take my dog for a walk.  I was positive that I had put them in one of three places.  But they weren’t there!  The more I looked, the more frustrated and angry I became.  Finally, I sat down on my couch, determined to cool down before looking anymore.  As my mind quietened, and I said a quiet, pleading prayer, I remembered where I had left them.  I looked and there they were…

Another example:  A new friend, on several occasions, has made promises that she hasn’t kept.  I admit that I first wondered what I had done wrong or why she wasn’t keeping her promises.  As I have refused to cling to any one “true” interpretation of her actions, I have found that I can let things “be” and continue our friendship in the way it is progressing and not in the way I would like it to progress.

You will find, as I have, that when you let go of that one “true” meaning  you will become:

  • more empathic
  • more flexible
  • more open-minded
  • less tense and anxious
  • less judgmental with yourself and others
  • less frustrated
  • more curious
  • more generous with yourself and others
  • more even-tempered
  • more understanding.

Next time you find yourself clinging to a certain meaning or truth, I invite you to ask yourself, “What other meanings might be applicable here?”  As you do so, you will find a generosity of spirit, a pervading feeling of good-will and a willingness to be reflective rather than reactive.

Until next time,

Judith

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